KOSHER KOMEDY
By Josh Bains
Ayelet the Kosher Komic has what most Jewish comedians don’t. Kosher comedy.
Glatt
Kosher, actually. For an appetizer, take a flight with Ayelet on her
own imaginary Orthodox airline. Men and women will find themselves
seated on opposite sides of a partition. During a loss of cabin
pressure, Jewish prayer books will drop into laps instead of oxygen
masks. The pilot and co-pilot will join the evening prayer service to the rear of the aircraft. Movies won't be shown - ever.
Not ready to give up those frequent flyer miles? You still haven't heard her Jewish impression of Barney, the Russian dinosaur.
Seriously,
few people are as proud or vocal as the Kosher Komic about sticking
with traditional Jewish values. Ayelet (who prefers to be known
publicly as Ayelet the Kosher Komic) lives in the Old City of
Jerusalem. Once a blossoming Hollywood starlet, Ayelet traded in her
passion of performance for a chance at tradition. Judaism soon became
the focus of her life. For a time, Ayelet thought this love affair with
religion would destroy any hopes of her previous ambition. Then she
realized Judaism and show business aren't mutually exclusive. To prove
her point, this month she begins a world kosher comedy tour through
London, Toronto, and America.
It was in Queens, New York,
where Ayelet learned to speak. The other momentous event in her
upbringing was going to the neighborhood synagogue with her
grandmother. Her favorite part of the service was when the men would
sing Eitz Chaim Hi, a song comparing Judaism to a Tree of Life.
"I
have really good memories of that", says Ayelet. "It felt like an
incredible moment of unity. The strength and power of the Jews was in
that song."
At nine, she moved with her parents to Israel. It
was a difficult transition. There were new languages, customs, and
little luxury. "I didn't have my grandmother across the street anymore"
she laments. Four years later, Ayelet was able to return to her Jewish
grandmother, but found the pull of life in her Far Rockaway, New York
neighborhood leading away from traditional roots.
Ayelet knew
she was an actress. So did anyone near her. One of her 9th grade
teachers was moved to say that Ayelet would keep talking even if he
locked her in a closet. "I had a glimpse of knowing what I had", she
said. It was just a question of properly applying the talent.
Eventually,
she started splitting her time between the acting communities of New
York and Hollywood. Her most memorable role was a serial killer in an
HBO documentary called 'Autopsy 8'. She also made commercials. In one
spot, she played a cop smiling at a man about to jump off a building
because she liked his pants.
Ayelet calls this time her
"former life." She was completely uninvolved with Judaism, focusing on
career alone. "I did not want to get married", she says. "I did not
want to have children." Still, she felt her work was bringing negative
ideas into a world that didn't need them.
In the end, Ayelet
broke down, admitting she at least wanted a Jewish boyfriend. She
thought she might find one on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, and
began taking classes on Judaism at Aish HaTorah. "I didn’t really meet
any guys", admits Ayelet. "I met a lot of Rabbis and Rebbitzens."
Continuing
her boyfriend quest, she tried SpeedDating in Los Angeles. Again - no
men, but this time she scored a Rebbitzen who extended an invitation
for a Shabbat dinner. The prospect of free food won the day for the
struggling, over budget actress. Ayelet began to cultivate Shabbat. As
the number of observant weekends increased, she noticed a pattern of
mutual respect and happiness among the Jewish families whom she met.
She realized the nature of Orthodox Judaism was to give. Show business,
she says, had always left her feeling empty and alone by comparison.
The
chasm between the unity she knew in her grandmother's synagogue, and
the isolating path she had chosen herself, led Ayelet to return to her
Jewish roots. For two years, she stopped acting and devoted herself
completely to Jewish learning. She moved back to Jerusalem, undergoing
Aish HaTorah's all women’s Jewel program. She later intensified her
study by attending seminary at Eyaht, which she describes as a life
altering mix of Brady Bunch camaraderie, and Survivor hard living.
But
coming to Judaism was only half the battle. She had adopted an orthodox
sensibility about food, clothing, and modesty. Now she faced the
difficult task of reaffirming the actress she had always been. "I was
afraid what I worked for was completely lost", she says.
Her
fear seemed verified as she began rejecting opportunities to perform in
"unkosher" situations. "I had to be strong and say no", she says. "But
I felt better. I felt whole. There was no question in my mind I was
doing the right thing".
Through it all, Ayelet never stopped
talking. Now, she just talked about Torah - at Shabbat tables, in pizza
shops and moving buses. She began developing routines for kosher
comedy. When living rooms no longer held the all women audiences
generated from her explosive shows, the newly minted Kosher Komic
finally moved on stage.
"I’d like to think I’m using a Torah
way of humor", says Ayelet. "The first time we’re introduced to humor
in the Torah is with the story of Abraham and Sarah. The setup is:
You’re too old for kids. Then God says 'You’re having a baby!' That’s
the punch line."
"We can all find humor in our own heritage -
in our own background. People look at Jews and think we’ve been
oppressed, we’ve been enslaved, our lives are too serious, we have too
many rules, and above all - too many responsibilities. You know what?
It’s all true. Being a Jew means having a lot of responsibility. But
that doesn’t mean we can’t have fun and laughter and enjoyment. It
doesn’t mean life can’t be outrageous and spontaneous. Being able to
combine these elements enables one to have a truly fulfilled life."
For
Ayelet, fulfillment means performing her Jewish shtick exclusively for
women. (Members of the other gender will have to content themselves
with the Kosher Komic's CD.) "As long as you're not sitting there
watching me, there's nothing wrong with hearing my jokes", says Ayelet.
"I'm looking to have a women’s night out."
The Kosher Komic
says that people from every Jewish background will understand and
appreciate her humor. "I make light of situations. I do great accents.
I create characters. I find the humorous side of religion. I share my
sometimes-painful experiences of the past. Not only do I try to make
people laugh, but get them to think."
So, is there a moral for Ayelet the Kosher Komic?
"You can have it all" she reminds us. "You can be true to yourself and still have a good time."